Guardians of the (Mario) Galaxy?

On the verge of E3 2018, game announcements – and cryptic viral marketing – are flying at us left right and centre. Buried beneath the Pokemon avalanche of the last 24 hours, Fallout 76 and even Team Sonic Racing is the recent rumour that Starfox is being reimagined as a kart racer. Only Mario, Zelda, Smash and Mario Kart can truly be described as being on top form at the moment: Starfox devoid of its star status since the N64; Metroid Prime 3 is a decade old and perhaps worse of all F-Zero is stuck on the GameCube. The space between the high points of these franchises and where they stand now is vast but is also the thing which binds them: space…

These franchises – all set in the black – have struggled for a variety of reasons. Starfox has struggled to push past the reality of it being a plastic – yet furry – Star Wars. Metroid has never had the commercial appeal of its peers; F-Zero also has failed to reach Mario numbers. It is worth noting that Zelda: Breath of the Wild was the first real mega-success in terms of units sold. Although beloved by a hardcore army of fans, many Nintendo’s franchises beyond the aforementioned and Pokemon are in need of radical reform. What if Metroid and F-Zero and Starfox became one?

Banding together the unlikely heroes in Marvel’s Guardians of the Galaxy could be the inspiration for this. Captain Falcon – who many would be hard-pushed to associate with his franchise – needs a reboot/revamp in personality. Think 90s Tomb Raider to the PS3 era series or more recently God/Dad of War on PS4. Give him an edge. Give him a purpose other than winning races. Make him Starlord.

Obviously, the small mammal role goes to Fox McCloud. Star Fox’s plucky captain would make a good fit to the group as well as competition to Falclord (you.are.welcome.Nintendo). It also gives a narrative excuse to cut some of Fox’s anthropomorphic ensemble cast. Contrastingly, Samus Aran of Metroid fame has struggled to hold down a meaningful supporting set of characters. Samus brings an air of mystique, a sense of duty and also prevents this being a fully male team. It would be easy to call her the Gamora of the group but Samus is far too incorruptible as a renowned yet straight- laced bounty hunter. She is the boy-scout (girl guide?)/Superman (erm..Supergirl) of the group.

That uses up the A-list characters from these franchises; there are still two places to fill. Drax and Groot are the two (MCU lineup) guardians remaining. This is where it gets weird.

Groot is a fairly easy character to cast. Petey Piranha from the Mario series is an obvious candidate. That would be a like-for-like switch. Another possibility is a Pikmin. It stands to reason that this group could have stumbled across these creatures at some point. Finally, a Deku Shrub from Zelda could fit the bill if we really wanted to connect the UNESverse (that’s either a TM or a cease and desist…).

In the role of the muscle, there are more limited options. Who is this crew’s Jayne? There’s only one answer: Waluigi! This would add a criminal element to the ensemble whilst giving this cult favourite a chance to shine at last. If not, insert your choice of Pokemon here.

Now that we’ve got a lineup, the genre needs nailing down. What would be the game style of choice? A 3rd person Tomb Raider/Witcher/Uncharted style adventure would possibly fit best. With the unique abilities of the characters co-op or squad mechanics would add variety to each play through. Perhaps there are branching areas and secrets only specific characters can access. It would be a great addition to Nintendo’s online portfolio. If we really want to dream, adding in Strikes and Raids – in addition to a story mode – would give Nintendo their games as a service title. There would definitely need to be racing and Arwing battles to pay homage to previous games.

On a quick note, the antagonist could easily be one of the many previously seen in the individual series. Or a newly created character. Or Earthworm Jim…

Back in 2014’s Guardians of the Galaxy, we are introduced to each character in a police lineup as they are processed ready to send to the kyln. Imagine the Nintendo equivalents in that lineup (probably not having Falclord giving the middle finger).

Advertisements

Nintendo Indirect

Evaluating the hidden clues in the recent Nintendo Direct

Last Thursday’s Nintendo Direct was the one which finally met – and probably exceeded – all expectations. However, there’s a few bits and pieces of subtext to what Nintendo announced:

1. GameCube Virtual Console isn’t happening

Basically any title Nintendo releases in 3D post 2001 is game for a HD/3DS remake. Expect Mario Sunshine and Wind Waker/Twilight Princess to fill in the gaps between the next original incarnations of the series. Why charge £7.99 on virtual console when you can charge £49.99, right? If the games come with modern advancements like wide-screen that’s fine with me.

2. Samus Aran

Smash Bros usually has the most recent iteration of Nintendo characters in its roster so we can expect a few subtle hints to what Nintendo’s underused bounty hunter will be up to in Metroid Prime 4. It would be unthinkable to fathom a Smash game without her; I anticipate more than one tease for her next adventure.

3. Wii U 2019

With Captain Toad, Hyrule Warriors and Donkey Kong hitting Switch this year already – joining Mario Kart 8 – Nintendo seems to be drip feeding the Switch’s predecessor’s back-catalog out over the next few years. Mario 3D World, Mario Maker, Yoshi and New Super Mario Bros will no doubt pop up later in Switch’s lifecycle. OG Wii re-releases are conspicuously by their absence though…

4. E3 is all about Holiday 2018

The Switch has a healthy selection of support going to the end of July. June’s E3 events (whether they be Directs or Treehouse Live) will be all about the holiday season. We know Smash will be there but expect at least three more titles to pick up in time for Christmas. One of those will likely be Labo based and with Metroid Prime 4 and Pokemon looking like 2019 games, we might see HD re-releases or spin offs from these series. Plus we’ll know exactly what Virtual Console/Nintendo Classic/Nintendflix will look like too!

Possibly the most important and exciting piece of information from the Direct was how bullish Nintendo is prepared to be. Q1 was clearly just a chance for everyone to catch their breath before the big guns came out. Crash Bandicoot, Okami, South Park and No More Heroes are the right types of games for Switch: ideally suited to the versatility of the console. Expect even more at E3 to wrestle attention from Spider-Man and (yawn) Crackdown 3. It’s good to see the kind of swagger Nintendo has seldom been willing to share.

10 Predictions for Xbox in 2018

Football rules here: 3 points for a win, 1 for a draw (half-happens) and diddly-squat for a loss.

1. Xbox One X Price Drop – already had dramatic deals and bundle-ins: inevitable and likely sub £400 to compete with PS4 Pro

2. Kinect Replaced – Alexa/Siri style wireless peripheral reintroduces voice commands to the Xbox interface

3. Crackdown 3 Fails – underwhelming and not wait the wait

4. <E3 announcement voice> Console Launch Lifetime Exclusive for Today – Microsoft tie a major 3rd party title to timed exclusivity

5. Dormant Rare Franchise Rebooted – Banjo Odyssey anyone? Perfect Dark Zero Dawn? Hmm?

6. Halo 6 – announced not released; the game is vastly different from predecessors (games as a service or reboot)

7. Lost at Sea of Thieves – has a moment but quickly drops off: like Arms

8. Cuphead 2 – announced at E3 to thunderous applause

9. Xbox One S 1TB – becomes the base standard of the Xbox One family and 500GB consoles are sold off for peanuts

10. Momentum – Xbox now resigned to 3rd place this generation but ground is gained on PS4

Dlc Ruined my Games!

In 2015, I did something I believed would be a no-brainer, low-risk investment: I bought the Fallout 4 Season Pass (or expansion pass or whatever it was called) at launch. When I purchased Fallout 3, I had waited for and loved the Game of the Year edition which included all expansions so this was a logical step to take. 200 hours into Fallout 4 though I’ve only scratched the surface of the added on content. It’s release came long after I was ‘done’ with the game. Bethesda RPGs are like comfort food for me: I’ll always drop back into them on a rainy day but I certainly didn’t get my money’s worth here. Loot boxes have dominated the paid-for expansion conversation this year but this generation’s dlc has possibly been overlooked for scrutiny – overshadowed by the likes of the former. So, I decided to analyse the dlc I’ve purchased this generation.

Batman Arkham Knight

Upon release, the ambiguous dlc plan was much maligned: the season Pass was put out without details of what it would include. I completed most of the on-disc content (Riddler challenges: nope!) but had been stung by the lacklustre Arkham City dlc. I decided to wait until the content went on sale. Over the next couple of years, I picked up the odd character skin pack a la carte plus the Batgirl add-on. However, the season pass came up in a PSN flash sale for £5.99 earlier in the year so decided to finally cough up despite owning some of the content already; it was cheaper to do it this way than buy the remainder individually. I played the Season of Infamy add on for one night and have not touched it since.

Hindsight verdict: stick to the core game. Arkham Knight’s ending – despite missteps along the way – was conclusive. Extending Batman’s final hours felt forced and unnecessary.

Star Wars Battlefront

At the height of Force Awakens mania, Disney Infinity 3.0 and Battlefront were bought. It was the start of the Xmas holidays when the latter was purchased; this resulted in jumping into a game which already full of seasoned experts with the game already having been out a while. After regularly getting kicked about in online shootouts I quickly moved on. When Rogue One released last year – alongside a free dlc weekend – I fell for it again: picking up the discounted season pass (and Star Wars Racer Revenge). It did give a few weeks of gameplay but I never really dived deep enough to warrant £50 (original gam +expansions) being spent on it.

Hindsight verdict: this expansion experience did not go the way I thought it would.

Destiny

First, a disclosure: I currently have no plans to buy Destiny 2’s expansions until further down the line. Having sunk nearly 100 hours into D2, I’m done with it for a while. Anyway, I bought all of Destiny 1’s add-on content and was happy to do so considering the ongoing nature of the game. I know I’m in the minority when I say this but I loved vanilla Destiny. Farming materials, learning those initial strikes off by heart and original Dinkle-bot were all part of this. Destiny’s expansions was more ‘pay to keep up’ content than ‘additional’. None of them hit the same high notes of the core game – in my opinion – despite adding much-needed story and Nathan Fillion. All in all Destiny cost me about £175 which is a fair reflection of the hundreds of hours I sunk into this ground-breaking game.

Hindsight verdict: D1 was one hell of a ride; albeit one which slowed towards the end. Despite the high price of entry to its full experience, it was worth it.

The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild

Nintendo’s Switch launch title is our game of the year – along with many other media sites’. However, the end-of-year, final expansion release almost changed this: for me, the additional content nearly ruined the memory of this amazing game. In the core game, all shrines have been conquered and Ganon has long since been defeated (once on Wii U and once on Switch). Unfortunately the tedious fetch quests for armour along with cheap, one hit KO missions in the expansions sully the inventive game design of the on-cart game. After a few evenings of trying to force myself to enjoy them (the second in particular) it’s time to finally move on from Hyrule.

Verdict: after vast expansions on some of Wii U’s games, Breath of the Wild’s expansions leave a lot to be desired. I wish I’d stuck to the original game.

My reflections on these experiences lead to an intriguing question. Currently, I’m knee-deep in Horizon: Zero Dawn. Weeks after picking it up on Black Friday, I’m still hooked delving through the quirky side-quests and errands. With the Frozen Wild’s expansion now out, is it worth picking this up? With more negative experiences than positive with dlc this generation I wonder if it would be better to let this amazing game just be. I don’t want it become another Zelda…

Xbox Mini?

Nostalgia for past consoles appear to be at an all time high with Nintendo’s licence to print money: the SNES Classic. Coming a year after the NES Classic, the recently released 16 bit bundle of goodness has flown off shelves. A like minded Gameboy Classic or PlayStation Classic should be expected over the next few years; but what about Xbox?

Entering the console space near the start of the millennium, Microsoft doesn’t quite have the rich history its competitors do. What they do have though is the roadmap for what the next generation of consoles will look like. The iterative Xbox One X will either be the true beginning of the end of distinctive console generations akin to mobile phone updates or it will be the Xbox One 32X: repeating SEGA’s expensive mistake it the 90s. What Microsoft do offer – to a greater extent than Sony or Nintendo – is choice: the vanilla Xbox One, Xbox One S and the X. With production of the original console ending, a new third pillar should be expected. Could this be Microsoft’s answer to a ‘classic’ or ‘mini’ console? Let me explain…

Since the 360 days, there have been rumblings of a discless Xbox. This may finally be a reality. Imagine if you will, a smaller, streamlined Xbox One: HD – no 4k, 500gb hard drive and packaged with some classic games. The Xbox One will soon be compatible with the full lineage of Xbox games from the original Xbox 1 to the modern Xbox One. This would enable the One family to be its own retro machine – if you want it to be. One of the biggest criticisms of the Nintendo classics has been the lack of expansion: further downloadable titles would have been another money maker for Nintendo. 

Xbox One C? Xbox One Mini? Xbox One TV? Whatever it would be called, a cheaper (£150?) Xbox One might just be the best of both worlds. For now, Sony and Microsoft are ignoring the home/handheld hybrid market (don’t quite believe that…) but the mini market may just be about to explode. We can expect at least one more retro console from Nintendo; time will tell if Microsoft can exploit their unique position and marry the past, present and future together. 

Destiny 2: Trials of Parenting

Listening to the Kinda Funny crew this week, they discussed an interesting topic: an article about Destiny 2 and parenting. The full article from Kotaku’s Keza MacDonald can be found here: Kotaku. So here’s our take on this hot topic…

Firstly, parenting is a wonderful, dreadful challenge which subconsciously and consciously challenges you for the rest of your life. Every decision you make is influenced by the fact you are now a parent revealing a new layer of feeling under your existing psyche and mentality.

Point in reference: the death of the Wayne’s in Batman. I’ve watched this hundreds of times pre-children but it was watching it again in Batman Begins when my nerve failed to hold. I could feel my eyes welling up and my mind wandered; what would my children do if a Joe Chill was lurking outside the local cinema? How would this impact their lives beyond the obvious? So, with all this in mind, let’s return to Destiny. 

Andrea Rene made a great observation at Kinda Funny: the distinction between being a ‘new’ parent and being a parent. It does get easier over time as you learn to deal with another human’s day to day problems as well as your own but all stops on the parenting timeline offer unique opportunities to experience games and I’d like to share some.

A month after my first born arrived, I bought a PlayStation 4. This was in 2014. A sleep deprived wreck, I quickly realised something in between the 2am and 6am feeds: warming a bottle, waking our daughter and feeding took roughly the same amount of time as a game of FIFA. Cue Vince McMahon excitement meme. When she settled into a more regular routine, our daughter slept for about two hours each morning and afternoon as well as 12 hours at night. This allowed me to settle back into more regular gaming patterns. This coincided with the release of Destiny 1. Over the next months, Destiny became comfort food – like FIFA – jumping into a strike for 15 minutes. I didn’t need to think or try to remember where I left off; it was just there waiting for me. This is what excites me now for Destiny 2.

Within a week of launch, Destiny 2’s campaign was over and I’m steadily climbing the light ladder. My fireteam – who are not yet parents – are Raid-ready and are deeper into the end game content like the Nightfall Strikes. However, when I jump on, we still find common ground. There is always something the we can do which is productive in pushing those stats up. If I do get chance to do the raid, like any extended event in my life, I’ll have to consider the kids first. If you want to do it there’s always a way. Like Keza though, I’ll always be one step behind my responsibility-free guardian friends. At least for now, but this may change.

My kids are three and one and we have a great thing at the moment: playing games together. We play games like Yooka-Laylee and they pretend to be the titular characters; sometimes it’s one of the LEGO games or – a great game for anyone – Slime Rancher. It’s still a bit early to put them into Destiny but I’m looking forward to the day we can. Take IGN general manager Peer Schneider’s examples of hooking four PlayStation 4 consoles up to play multiplayer together or roaming the battles of Splatoon 2 as a family. Parenthood closes one chapter on our gaming lives; I’ll probably never spend 14 hours straight playing Fallout 3 like I did in 2009 but parenthood also opens another door: one which is perhaps most of us thirty-somethings can relate to.

If – like me – you were brought up with Nintendo and SEGA viewed as ‘kids toys’ which would inevitably end up at a car boot sale with He-Man and Thundercats, we now have the opportunity to usher in a new age for computer games. The shift to popular culture and an acceptable pastime began with the PlayStation in 1994 but now the way we interact with our children and games births the opportunity to fully realise this. For the time being, playing great games and sharing thirty years of wonderful experiences – both digital and real life – with my kids is amazing. At the end of a hard day, I know a cheeky half an hour on Destiny 2 is a great way to pass the time. 

Royale Revolution?

Which games should have Battle Royale modes?

The newest in-thing in games is the ‘Battle Royale’ genre; is it a game mode or a feature which should be exclusive to PlayerUnknown’s Battlegrounds (PUBG)? The premise is a 100 player death match on an island with an increasingly shrinking playing area – a bit like a digital Hunger Games. Fortnite has been one of the first ‘fast followers’ to the Battle Royale party and has been met with friction from PUBG. The term is here to stay – like Metroidvania or Roguelike – as Alanah Pearce wrote for IGN recently (http://m.uk.ign.com/articles/2017/09/22/pubg-publicly-shaming-fortnite-is-a-terrible-pr-move). But which other games would make for awesome Battle Royals modes?

Destiny 2: Trials Royale

Could you imagine this? The carnage would be incredible: especially if you could drop in as a fireteam. The weapon collecting system from PUBG would be redundant to a certain extent though placing vehicles and/or limited use weapons could make it even more interesting. Destiny 2’s open world style world maps would be ideal for a 100 player fight to the death mode. 

The Legend of Zelda: Battle of the Wild

Unlikely yet simultaneously logical. Drop 100 Links on a region of the map with nothing Eventide Island style and procure weapons on site. Throw a few Lynels in for good measure too. No, wait – let one person be the Lynel…No amiibo!

Metal Gear Solid 5: The Phantom Pain of Battling Royale 

This game has sat on my shelf for two years now since completion; the mechanically-perfect masterpiece is perhaps the most likely candidate for a Battle Royale shooter. Clearly the blend of stealth and bombastic, Bay-esque firepower would be an excellent template to unleash 100 Infants Terrible upon each other. 

Pokemon: Battlemon Tournament

Hear me out. Choose a starting Pokemon and acquire 5 Pokeballs. Drop 100 Pokemon trainers onto an open, full world map such as Kanto and slowly narrow the map area. Aside from your starter, all Pokemon are caught in the game world and there are no Pokemon Centres. Revives and Potions etc are procedurally dropped around the world. This is the best bit: just like in the core-game RPGs, any trainers making eye contact must battle. Once all Pokemon in your party faint, it’s game over. Only the very best – like no one ever was – will win! 

Mario Kart 8: Royale Dash

100 drivers. 3 balloons each.  Wuhu Island. Done. 

Banjo-Kazooie: Nutz N Battlez

Banjo and Kazooie’s last outing – nearly 10 years ago – suffered from not being what their fan base wanted. The construction tools in this game are simple to understand yet have amazing depth. Drop bear and bird into the battlefield and scour for new parts. Don’t be caught in the menu screens though; budding engineers need to assemble new parts quickly and efficiently. The other 99 players are made up of Banjo’s supporting cast like Bottles as well as long forgotten platform heros like Cool Spot, Zool and Earthworm Jim. Last 90s mascot standing wins. Yooka and Laylee available as paid dlc. 

Which games do you think should take inspiration from PUBG? Let us know in the comments or on Twitter @pennilessdads